Wochende ist immer schneller als ich dachte

Well... so another weekend is gone. I have to think again what special things I did. Saturday was a busy day for the family because of the confirmation of a good friend's son. They invited us for the lunch and then tea time. We went to the place and helped on Saturday morning. Elisabeth had to bake a lot for them. I spoke with mm in the afternoon with non patience. I don't know how to describe it. I am already 16. And she was still talking to me as if I was a baby. I was so unhappy and angry. She wasn't considerate at all. I don't really speak that good Chinese now simply because that I don't use it right now. Can you imagine how it is after a long time to speak a completely different language? MM was like... are you busy in the moment or what??? HELLO... I didn't do anything except speaking with her. I hate that... She said  I only wanted to say the thing I wanted without listening to her. Oh... it's difficult to tell how angry I was... Today was the confirmation, church in the morning, lunch together, tea time. That was planned,but they had too much to speak. There was even dinner. The meals were very good as buffet. I was so full. And after the whole day, I'm exactly exhausted right now. I didn't sleep well last night... Well... I don't know why, but I wanted to play sudoku so much.. I thought I couldn't sleep without playing it. At first, I needed to find a pencil because my school bag was downstairs and I was lazy. I was looking for a pencil for like 20 minutes or more... I found it, and then I couldn't find sudoku... I didn't want to give up even though I was so tired. I needed again about 20 minutes to find it. I was so...... I think it's always more difficult to get up with the alarm clock than get up naturally.

A weekend passed again... the thing I want to declare. I don't like you at all... the only thing I miss is only the way you talk. I don't need a boyfriend. I need someone who can talk to me like you, you and you. Of course I can talk to a very good female friend, but I know it will never be the same. Girls still need a guy. well, a good one. hmm... A boyfriend only gives the girl unsafety. SO IS IT.

HELLO, SCHOOL DAYS.

08.04.11

Today wasn't really an impressing day. Ju invited to go with her, Paddy, Martin and Erick to Mannheim. However, I refused it because I innocently considered Leohard had his riding course today. Actually, he didn't. I changed my mind to go to Mannheim with them, but you know... it was already too late. It was still a good afternoon with STRAWBERRIES. I always feel like the happiest girl in the world when I eat strawberries. It's really one of my favourite fruits. Elisabeth bought some. It was a comfortable afternoon with the shining sun. Vicki and I sat outside and ate strawberries!!! Three boxes of strawberries belonged to us two!!! Later on we watched TV together.... It was about... well... kind of stupid friendship. The girl trusts her best friend too much. And actually, her best friend is a bitch that even slept her boyfriend. There's actually the same kind of the bitches everywhere. We went to Kaiserslautern in the evening. I didn't buy anything. I need to save for my Europe tour. mmpp, I love you!!! We went home and I cooked for the family, fried rice with eggs, pork and vegetables. Elisabeth had already frozen cooked Asian vegetables, so it wasn't difficult at all. I'm glad they like it. We made kind of a funny video when I was cooking until Leohard asked to eat...

I talked with CCAANNDDYY today. It was awesome. It has been such a long time I didn't talk with the friends before becase of the time difference that we don't really have a lot of time to talk. I feel super good these days, so I don't really want the contact with Taiwan.

Can't imagine Europe tour is right next week... HEY... I'M COMING

What I want to say is only there's always someday people will be old

The title of this article comes from the way by bus home today. I went home by bus today as everyday. Well... except I missed the bus today, there was nothing more special than everyday. It was definitely not my fault, also it was not the first time to see how the busses are here.  Anyway, I took the bus at 17:00 today. This bus takes about 50 minutes to go home. Usually, I need 20 minutes to go home. We live here in the countryside, therefore there's definitely some one-way roads that can only contain one car. Not like in Taiwan, almost every road should be able to contain 2 ways. Today on the way we passed the narrow path there was an old man with his wheelchair. The way was totally too tiny that the bus needed to stop to drive slowly because of him. The bus driver was likely shouting some bad words in the bus to tell that the old people with the wheelchair shouldn't be alone there for a walk. When we passed carefully next to the old man, the man even raised his hand for forgiveness. I felt some ashamed for the bus driver. In the moment I wanted to tell him Sir, be careful, be more sympathetic you know you'll be old too someday. I don't really like the youth these days. I'm also a part of them, but sometimes I really feel ashamed for our impoliteness. How can we be so unkind? I mean we don't need to be super nice. That only looked fake. At least, we need to learn to respect more. Every period is the way of life everyone goes.

Well... it's so warm these days.... sometimes I think it's too warm. I don't want to get suntan. I don't want to look brown.

Herr Rossy offered to drive me home today if the bus didn't come. Well... his impression in my mind changed a lot. Actually, he wasn't that boring and unkind.

My cellphone is kind of weird. I couldn't get the messages the others sent to me... I don't like that...

Friday.... only 5 hours and then weekend ... I can't wait!!!

So ist das Leben

So I don't want to talk about the annoying thing. That's life. We search and then we can find a good way to lead our lives. Through the time, we're clearer and clearer. We know the way to be better we find the way to be stronger, don't we? The answer is yes, we do. We won't force people to do the same thing as we think, but we most of time we make ourselves to be cooperated to the others.

These days with the new family are quite good. I'm glad that we are all able to get to know our host families before living with them. I like all of my host siblings! They are all so sweet.

There's a thing I must say. I'm proud of myself. The piano course yesterday was good... It has been such a long time I don't really practice something... I'm so lazy these days. Starting playing Memory, it's difficult. I need more practice.

I think I'm going to Rotaract tomorrow...

so I lost people gradually

I'm sure these days at least 3 days I won't really be in a good mood. I'm kind of frustrated. Why is it so difficult? Why should you care? The question sounded so easy but deep. Well... fuck you... it's the first thing I wanted to say. And you are really a BITCH. What am I supposed to be in your eyes? A bitch that you can come and go away without saying a word? Like I said, the one who falls in love at first is the loser. You all made me understand it... Thank you! I don't want to admit I lost the love game. It wasn't like that. I didn't even want to look at you. You know why our relationship was like that. It was really because I had been all the time too lonely. It seems I'm not the kind of girl that can life without a guy or guys around me. I really really don't want to admit that... but that's kind of the fact. I feel weak when I am without a guy talk like you and whom I can speak to. Why is it so difficult? You know sometimes I wanted to give you everything you wanted, but I was so afraid that you would leave me if you got everything. Well... you and you and you ... you are all moving out of my life. Who can I believe now? I'm still standing there like a fool. I'm like the kind of girl that loses the love game easily... I couldn't afford it right now. It'll be better after someday. To love is the thing you can't force people to do. It is like that... You'd better face the reality before you wake up again from your fond dream.

forget the bitch... and dream again! cheer up...

Familie Wechseln

It has been kind of the long time again that I start to work on my blog. It was however not all my fault, just my computer couldn't search the cable of the Internet last 2 days. It was such a mess. After changing the family, you had no INTERNET... kind of a big trouble. So now I'm starting to tell my life these days.

On Friday was officially the last day that I stayed in Galles'. I wasn't that sad. I think it's because 3 months weren't that long. I was close to them, but there's really no need to cry or feel sad. Ju lives there right now, so it's  anyhow easier for me to visit them.  Sammi gave me a sweet letter! He's really so sweet but sometimes annoying. That's true. On Friday evening, Elena went to her friend's birthday party, Simone, Ortwin and I went to the movie in Eisenberg together. We watched Hall Pass. The film told a story of marriage that the couple were already fed up with each other, so the wives gave their husbands one week break from the marriage. They didn't live at home for the whole week and the husbands could do whatever they wanted. It was a funny comedy but not for the family to watch together. Ortwin chose the film and it was actually embarrassing for us three to watch together. And it was the first time to be in an empty cinema with only us three. It was already a cool experience!

On Saturday morning Juliette came to replace my position. hahaha! It's a joke. well... no one can be replaced in the others' mind. We had breakfast together and later Simone drove us together to Frau Schoenaur-Gregg and then Langmeil. I've started my life in Langmeil officially. It's still quite good till now. Sometimes they're too quite, too silent... silent enough to let people scared, but not when all the kids are here. They've really got a lot of relatives. When the kids are all here. it's always full of energies. I like that.  They (Elisabeth, Vicki, Leohard, Conilia and Jonas) went to the orchestra concert in Alsenz. It was good and cool even though the songs were difficult. I picked the piccolo again too late.... I hate that. We arrived home at about 22:00. We cooked some french fries, nuggets and bbq wings to eat... We were starving! I've got the feeling I'll get very fat with the family... OH MY GOD...

On Sunday, I gave a little girl flute course. She has learned it for less than 2 months... It's difficult. I mean, if you can't play the tone well, you won't have the motivation to practice because it sounds stupid and ugly. I went once through the process too. I know how it is.

Again Monday, a weekend almost completely without the Internet... I don't really miss you...

Tomorrow if I get more time, I'll type some bitches down. Well... some bitches pissed me off...

gooooooooooooooodbye

Again Monday

lazy lazy and lazy

So I've already skipped one day... Well...it's always like that. After some days, I've got no interests in doing the same things everyday. It's a bad bad habit...

Yesterday was the day I was afraid of, Bundesjugendspiel. I hate that. It's kind of sport day. In winter we have to do gymnastics and in summer we do some outside activities. We all learned gymnastic at school before. hmm... It was already hard for us what we'd learned at school In Germany, pupils do the gymnastics like 100 times more difficult than us. And they think it's not that difficult.Well... kind of ironic. However, I suffered it. No one laughed... I was so glad of it. I've always been sort of girl that really cares a lot a lot and I'm not able to change myself now and in the future...

I went to school today on time, but Herr Lenbach was not there. Then I went home again. I helped Ortwin a little bit and had longer breakfast. I think I didn't really do something special today. I got 3- in chemistry. Anyway, I don't really care. And I got 3- in Katagana test. I really think it's simply too difficult to remember so many symbols. Frau Hoffman had to give the marks to the students in Bundesjugendspiel, so we had the last 2 hours free. I went home packed and made my room a little bit cleaner...

I decided to buy some chocolate to put in my package because there was still a little bit spaces in the package . Ortwin drove me to the supermarket on the way Sammy had hip-hop lessons. Some minutes before we drove away, Fible talked to me. He asked me if I like him or not. Well... I'm sure there was someone who said something ironic or stupid or he bet with someone. That was why he asked me. Well... I told him I don't know. The reason is because it's difficult to discover you like someone or not. And because of the last relationship, I decided to not like someone easily. I mean I always want someone to be there to talk to me like him, but I don't want any relationship. That's too hard... I'm the one who always worries too much, cares too much. However, it's just too complicating to last relationship. Another reason is I don't want to be hurt again, so I can have someone who's close to me. The one who falls in love first is the loser. Simply, I don't want to lose the love game. I can have kind of open relationship, but I'm not able to have a real relationship now. And however, we can't only talk about that online.
The rule of the love game is DO NOT FALL IN LOVE AT FIRST!
After going to the supermarket, we met each other at 18:00 in Panda Chinese restaurant next by Hotel Braun. We were there to celebrate the end of living in this host family, kind of farewell. I feel glad! I really love them! I love the whole family! And then I went directly to Rotaract meeting in Hotel Braun. The theme today was also not so impressing... however, finally I got the chance to say a little bit things right now took courage to do it. It wasn't that hard. There was a new woman with blond hair. I think she's beautiful. Her name's Janina. We went to the new Italian restaurant in Schillerhain everyone together then. Janina drove me there. We talked a little. She's actually really nice. It wasn't embarrassing at all. You won't know how embarrassing it is to sit in the car alone without talking. I like her. She lives in Goellheim and offered to drive me home. She also mentioned she can also pick me up in Langmeil and drive me home, so it won't be the last time I go to Rotaract! SUCH A NICE WOMAN!
The day is over and over again and again... faster and faster again...